What's in your fingers today is on your hips tomorrow.

Ever since I read that quote in my title it has stuck in my mind. It is true though.
Food has become so sickening to me lately. I nearly cried when my mum served me a pizza for my evening meal, thankfully she let me eat it in my room so I used the chew & spit method for some of it and threw the rest of the pieces in a bag and put it in my dustbin. I also nearly cried at the thought of what I have actually eaten today and potentially what I might have to eat tomorrow. I still haven't come up with a way not to eat at work. They insist that I have something for lunch and the food there is either very unhealthy or healthy but in big portions, I really don't know what to do. I should use my imagination to solve this problem.

So today I have had 450 calories. I hate this! It seems like so much. I wish I could have stayed at least under 300 calories. I am kind of glad though that I am under 500.
My thinspo book is also looking so much more full and better lately. I am spending loads of time making it look good and filling it with photos and quotes. It really does help me not eat.

There is also a video on youtube I found that I really like. I love the song on it and I think it's really well put together.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=channel&v=Gzgx8boPT14

You have to confirm you're over 18 to watch it but I just made an account ages ago with a fake age so I can watch videos like that.
I was also meant to go to the gym today but I have been too lazy and tired, I can't go tomorrow either as I am working so I will have to try and go over the weekend. I haven't weighed myself today either, I am too scared. I will tomorrow though. Hopefully I'll be pleased with the result.
x