The Tears Wont Stop.

I haven't posted here in a long time, mainly because I haven't made any real progress still at 109lbs, it's so annoying.
Right now though this is the only place I can let my feelings out. I have the worst argument with my boyfriend, he has upset me so much it's horrible. I can't believe he would ever be like this towards me. What sickened me even more was he tried to make out that the guy who originally caused me to develop an eating disorder has affected him! I can't understand that, it's my pain and hurt not his. He is completely in the wrong and wont admit it. It makes me so angry. He was invited me out tonight I hope he doesn't break up with me but this is sort of what I am expecting. I am scared.

I can't eat at the moment. I feel too sick to eat even if I wanted to eat everything in my kitchen right now I couldn't possibly do it. So I guess every cloud does have some sort of silver lining. I feel so low thought it is horrible and earth shattering. Hopefully my worst fear wont come true. Now all I can do is sit here and wait for him to come to my house.